Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
