If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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