Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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