new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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