yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
