I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
