did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize
