I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
