i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
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