Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
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