1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Randomize
