If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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