I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
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