you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
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