I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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