You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
