i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize