i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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