Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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