So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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