So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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