if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
We are all done wearing pants today
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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