You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
