Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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