I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
