I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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