we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
