Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
