i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
