Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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