It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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