You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Randomize
