holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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