i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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