I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize