Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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