Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
