Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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