no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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