Did you just see the Batmobile???
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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