You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
i was born a porn star she said
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize