yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Randomize
