I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
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You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
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I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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