Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize