next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
