marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
