He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
