so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.