He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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