Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
