she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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